I have stumbled upon a book which I've decided to share because it has some special qualities. It's entitled, Women by Design, by Penelope Swithinbank. The way Penelope shares personal anecdotes as well as other women's makes the book very relatable. A strong point of the book is her discussion of singleness; she covers a nice range of issues that can apply to singles, though I'm not sure why this topic wasn't given its own chapter.
The following list contains some of the topics that are discussed in the book, along with their page numbers:
- Appearances versus reality: 45-48, 66, 68
- Communication between the sexes: 95-96
- Comparing oneself to other women: 15-16, 18-20, 66-67
- Comparison of God's design of men and women: 16-18, 81-82
- Contentment within difficult circumstances: 67-70
- Differences in how women choose to spend time with the Lord and prayer methods: 59-65
- Differences in the personalities of women, including how those differences translate to serving in the church and the world through spiritual gifts: 14-16, 18-20, 82-84, 106-114
- Disadvantages faced by women in the world: 12-13
- God as Father: 50-56
- Hopelessness (though I'm not sure if this is the right word to describe her situation, nor is depression): 11, 46-47
- Idols: 40-41, 43-45, 83, 98-99, 123, 124
- Influencing and shepherding other women: 13, 18, 45-46, 70-73, 78-79, 83-84, 99-104, 116, 120-124
- Inner beauty: 79-81
- Life paths/careers: 12-13, 29-31, 36-41, 44, 72, 76-79, 85-87, 115, 123, 124
- Loving those we find difficult to love: 100-101
- Marriage: Chapter 7, 42-43, 101-101 (*see my comments at the end of the post)
- Mockery of the Christian ideal of purity: 70, 73
- Modesty: 80-81
- Purity: 20, 40-41, 70, 73
- Serving the church by joining in with something that's already been started versus starting something new: 116-117
- Singleness: 54, 67-73
- Spiritual maturity: 115-116
- Submission: 90-91
- The meaning of "a gentle and quiet spirit": 82-84
- The power of prayer: 100-101
- Worldliness/popular culture versus Christian values: 40-41, 84, 88, 93, 102-103
- WWJD: 103
The following is list of Biblical figures which are referred to and used for illustrative purposes (Penelope is so good at bringing these figures into the discussions and telling their stories):
- David: 27-29, 80, 106
- Esther: 81, 123-124
- Joseph: 73-74
- Leah: 67-69
- Mary (the mother of Jesus): 20-21
- Mary & Martha of Bethany: 56-59
- Moses: 58, 80
- Ruth: 31-34, 81
- the adulterous woman: 46-48
- the Pharisee and the tax collector: 82-83
- the woman at the well: 4-9
The following is a list of noted Christians who are mentioned in the book:
- Amy Carmichael: 26-27
- Corrie Ten Boom: 63
- Elisabeth Elliot: 76
- Helen Roseveare: 76
- Isobel Kuhn: 81
- Jackie Pullinger: 103
- John & Charles Wesley: 121
- Joni Eareckson Tada: 78
- Julian of Norwich: 42-43
- Mary Slessor: 76
- Mother Teresa: 81
- Saint Augustine: 52
Penelope employs the use of metaphors throughout the book in order to communicate truths; since I do love a good metaphor, I've compiled a list of them:
- cooking/recipes: 11-13
- Nivea cream: 16-17
- skiing: 23-24
- child learning to cook: 27
- driving: 30
- high-jumping: 34
- broken boiler: 35-36
- plastic beads versus priceless pearls: 43-45
- child in parent's lap: 50-51
- lawn-mowing: 53
- housework: 77-78
- learning a foreign language: 96
- lost earring: 98
- grape-peeling: 101-103
- shape sorter: Chapter 9
- drain-pipe: 110, 120
- engagement excitement: 119
- washing machine: 120-121
- favorite books: 121
- bonfire/Pamukkale: 124-125
A few passages I enjoyed from the book are listed below:
- teaching about Middle Eastern shepherds: 24 (the differences between shepherds in the Eastern world versus those in the Western, one of which Penelope relates here, are very enlightening)
- the God who reveals himself: 45-46
- the red raincoat and the red dress: 55-56
- the weather within: 69
- Penelope's description of holiness: 84
~ ~ ~
Below are a several issues I noticed in the book and some thoughts I have about parts of it:
~On page 42-43, when referring to a sermon by Max Sinclair, Penelope makes a statement about how people won't have a special relationship with anyone else in heaven. I'm not sure exactly what she means by that, so proceed with caution. Personally, I can't stand thoughts that are along that line, and I don't agree with them.
~On page 24, Penelope quotes a Bible verse, explaining that God was speaking to Isaiah; however according to my study Bible, He was referring to Christ.
~On page 95, when referring to Ephesians 5:22, Penelope says that she should "act towards [her husband] as if he was Jesus." I understand the point she is trying to make, but that might be carrying the metaphor a little too far or distorting the verse.
~On page 40, I find the statement about "declaring your sexuality to be different" to be potentially insensitive toward those who are lgbtqia+. I'm sure it can depend upon the situation at hand; however, referring to this as a "pressure" that's "hard to resist" could be completely inaccurate.
~Lastly, Penelope discusses her marriage and marriage in general. The picture she paints of her own marriage makes it seem like it is quite up-and-down. I don't think a marriage has to be like that or that all marriages are like that. I think that when she refers to the manual that says a bride shouldn't "expect too much," she's not tearing down marriage or being negative about it. I think she recognizes the difference between worldly happiness and Christian joy. For some reason, I'm reminded of a scenario (many of us have heard of something similar) when someone marries because she wants the party and the dress and the ring and the presents and the attention more than she actually wants to be married; she might not even be sure she's marrying the right person. It's important to have a good head on your shoulders and be mature about marriage. Next, Penelope asks, "How can we stay faithfully married for life and still have fun?" Number one, I don't think a faithful, life-long marriage and joy are at odds with one another. Number two, I think the Bible teaches that "fun" shouldn't be our top priority in this world (1 John 2:15). Joy and delight from the Lord, yes, but being too obsessed with having "fun" can be damaging in a marriage and in the rest of life too (depending upon what one's definition of fun is). I'm reminded of the title of a book, which I have not read: Sacred Marriage: What if God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy. Isn't that the purpose of life in general, not only marriage? Of course this doesn't mean that marriage should be unjoyful, depressing, or miserable, and each person should treat their spouse nicely, as the Bible teaches. All of this being said, I am not married, nor have I ever been (though I still have a right to my opinions, right?) ☺.
~ ~ ~
Below are a several issues I noticed in the book and some thoughts I have about parts of it:
~On page 42-43, when referring to a sermon by Max Sinclair, Penelope makes a statement about how people won't have a special relationship with anyone else in heaven. I'm not sure exactly what she means by that, so proceed with caution. Personally, I can't stand thoughts that are along that line, and I don't agree with them.
~On page 24, Penelope quotes a Bible verse, explaining that God was speaking to Isaiah; however according to my study Bible, He was referring to Christ.
~On page 95, when referring to Ephesians 5:22, Penelope says that she should "act towards [her husband] as if he was Jesus." I understand the point she is trying to make, but that might be carrying the metaphor a little too far or distorting the verse.
~On page 40, I find the statement about "declaring your sexuality to be different" to be potentially insensitive toward those who are lgbtqia+. I'm sure it can depend upon the situation at hand; however, referring to this as a "pressure" that's "hard to resist" could be completely inaccurate.
~Lastly, Penelope discusses her marriage and marriage in general. The picture she paints of her own marriage makes it seem like it is quite up-and-down. I don't think a marriage has to be like that or that all marriages are like that. I think that when she refers to the manual that says a bride shouldn't "expect too much," she's not tearing down marriage or being negative about it. I think she recognizes the difference between worldly happiness and Christian joy. For some reason, I'm reminded of a scenario (many of us have heard of something similar) when someone marries because she wants the party and the dress and the ring and the presents and the attention more than she actually wants to be married; she might not even be sure she's marrying the right person. It's important to have a good head on your shoulders and be mature about marriage. Next, Penelope asks, "How can we stay faithfully married for life and still have fun?" Number one, I don't think a faithful, life-long marriage and joy are at odds with one another. Number two, I think the Bible teaches that "fun" shouldn't be our top priority in this world (1 John 2:15). Joy and delight from the Lord, yes, but being too obsessed with having "fun" can be damaging in a marriage and in the rest of life too (depending upon what one's definition of fun is). I'm reminded of the title of a book, which I have not read: Sacred Marriage: What if God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy. Isn't that the purpose of life in general, not only marriage? Of course this doesn't mean that marriage should be unjoyful, depressing, or miserable, and each person should treat their spouse nicely, as the Bible teaches. All of this being said, I am not married, nor have I ever been (though I still have a right to my opinions, right?) ☺.
~ ~ ~
